The Simpsons: Tapped Out Time Traveling Toaster, Road to Riches, Donut Day 2017 and 4th of July 2017 content update/Time Traveling Toaster and Donut Day 2017/Gameplay

Act 1 Gameplay

The Time Traveler's Wife

The Time Traveler's Wife Pt. 2

After the user logs in on May 30th, 2017 (if Forgotten Anniversary wasn't started): Hey look! There's a new fat, bald loser in town. What's your name, you obvious idiot? I'm you, Homer, from the future! I come with a warning of utmost importance! Alright, pal, keep my pants on. What's the ruckus? And why the orange skin? Never mind that. You will soon forget your anniversary, but it is imperative that you not travel back in time to fix it. Why not just warn me to remember my anniversary? Yeah, that makes way more sense! Man, I used to be SMART. I'll make an anniversary gift for Marge. That way, it's free. All it costs is my time, which is completely worthless. Task: Build Homer's Workbench I will not rest until I've made the most amazing, heart-warming gift an anniversary has ever seen. Man, planning to make something is hard work. I think I'll take a rest. Quest reward: 100 and 10

It's About Time

It's About Time Pt. 1

After completing The Time Traveler's Wife Pt. 2: *SHRIEK!* I missed my anniversary! I've got to travel back in time and remind myself! Isn't that EXACTLY what Future You said not to do? I've never liked Future Me. One day there'll be something about this guy I just didn't trust back now. I suppose there's no harm in helping you try something impossible like time travel. I've got texts on advanced astrophysics, cosmology-- OR we could binge watch movies about time travel. "Time-Priest", "Bad Physicists", and "Medical Intern Strange" are personal favorites. Task: Make Homer Marathon Time Travel Movies (6s, Simpson House) Hollywood has taught me a valuable lesson: thinking about how time travel works is hard, so let's just make it up as we go! C'mon, gang! Quest reward: 100 and 10

It's About Time Pt. 2

After completing It's About Time Pt. 1: Beware, Homer Simpson! You tamper with the very fabric of spacetime! Yeah. So? Well... most people would consider that bad. With the PARADOXES and the BUTTERFLY EFFECTS and the OH, NOW I'M MY OWN DAD. Shut up and help me find my time traveling toaster. I think it's packed with the rest of the Halloween junk. A time traveling toaster? That's the most preposterous thing I've ever heard! Now, my time traveling panini press on the other hand... Task: Make Homer Travel Back in Time (6s, Simpson House) On job start during Act 1: I've gone back in time millions of years! I can tell I'm still in Springfield, though. The dinosaurs here all talk about how they're going to leave this provincial backwater one day, but you know they never will. On job start during Act 2: Uh-oh. I appear to have overshot my time travel -- I'm in Ancient Egypt! Which, conveniently and for the purposes of this update, sat in the same location as modern-day Springfield! On job start during Act 3: Water everywhere... a storyline that seems hastily thrown-together and nonsensical... oh no, I'm in Waterworld!!! Or, I've traveled back to pirate times. Oh please let it be murderous pirates and not Tin Cup with gills... On job end: What gives?! I wanted to go back just to my anniversary, not centuries ago! I'll remember your minor quibble when I'm dancing around, clad only in my Nobel Prize medal. Quest reward: 100 and 10

It's About Time Pt. 3

After completing It's About Time Pt. 2: I think I'll trust my time traveling needs to my faithful old toaster. Here's your panini press back, Mr. Mad Scientist. I am not MAD, I simply-- What in glayvin have you done to my invention?! Made a gloopy sandwich in it. And for the record, you do sound pretty mad right now. Dad, are you sure you should be meddling with time? Probably not. Still gonna, though. Task: Make Homer Meddle With Time (6s, Homer's Workbench) I collected so much cool stuff in the past, but none of it survived the journey back. What gives, stupid spacetime continuum? The only material objects that survive the journey are clothes. Because the alternative is too horrible to consider. If in act 1: Uh, Dad, I think you forgot to close the time door behind you! If in act 2: What the heck is papyri? It's the plural of papyrus. What the heck is papyrus?! I'm just gonna collect these pieces of paper instead. Quest reward: 100 and 10

Cloudy With a Chance of Sprinkles

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: Donuts, falling from the sky? Finally, an ironic outcome of time travel that ISN'T cruel and unusual! Kids, tilt your heads up and open your donut holes – it's raining diabetes! System Message Enjoy 15 free donuts and for a limited time, get Golden Scratch-Rs with your donut purchases! Quest reward: 15

Buried in Time

Buried in Time Pt. 1

After completing It's About Time Pt. 3: Brainstorm -- if I take stuff I find in the past and bury it, it'll be there for me to dig up in the present! Pretty smart, eh, Lisa? Well, no. You're still changing the past, with unpredictable implications for our current timeline. Let's try that again. Past-bury-now-dig-up-woo-hoo. Pretty smart, eh, Barney? REALLY smart, Homer! ... Task: Build the Excavation Site Task: Unearth a Hidden Gem Moral quandaries aside, I DO love unearthing ancient relics. I feel like Howard Carter discovering King Tut's tomb! Or Steve Martin discovering King Tut's song! Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10

Buried in Time Pt. 2

After completing Buried in Time Pt. 1: Groundskeeper Willie, we need more shovels to continue the excavation. Can we borrow some of yours? My shovels are nae for digging, lass. These pieces are for my Springfield Shovel Museum. Opening Spring, 2035. Possibly Summer, 2035. Does anyone really want to look at old shovels? Many of these shovels are priceless! In the sense they have no price, being utterly worthless. Well, I suppose we could buy some new shovels. As long as we don't invite in one of those huge national hardware chain stores. Task: Build Mom & Pop Hardware Task: Send Excavators to Acquire Shovels [x3] Do you think the name "Mom & Pop Hardware" might be just a tad misleading? It better be! Global Dynamics, parent company of M&PH, certainly paid the advertising company enough to come up with it. Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10

It's About Time (continued)

It's About Time Pt. 4

After completing Buried in Time Pt. 2: Hey, Frink, you fixed your panini press! It has sort of a lame "steampunk" vibe now. Yes, well, I had a lot of brass gauges sitting around. Purely accidental, of course. Then why are you wearing aviator goggles? All right, I admit it. I... I still think steampunk is cool. Anyway, I've altered the press to collect errant tachyons released by your temporal meddling. Ha ha! I'm sorry, but the nerd thinks a briefly-interesting subgenre from decades ago is still cool! Task: Place the Panini Press Schrödinger's cat! What was that gigantic explosion? Your stupid sandwich machine keeps breaking every time a sandwich gets made on it. It's not for cooking on you imbecile! Look! The tachyon emission blasted everyone back to their rightful time period. Once again, I have, through stupendous carelessness, solved all the problems I created with my inconceivable incompetence. You. Are. Welcome. Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10

Chaos Theory

After completing It's About Time Pt. 4: You've done it this time, you time-garbling nitwits! That blast just flooded every other Springfield with unwelcome visitors! Zombies! Zombies aren't real. Neither is time travel, yet here we are. You made this mess, you can tap your way out of it. Task: Tap Time Invaders in a Friend's Town [x3] Ahhhh, I'm a great neighbor... Homer, if you must dump your trash in my yard, well, okay. But do you have to go to the trouble of carrying it to my front door? ...such a great neighbor... Quest reward: 50 Event Currency and 10

It's About Time (continued)

It's About Time Pt. 5

After completing Chaos Theory: Homer, perhaps you would consider donating these ancient artifacts to found a Springsonian History Museum? Hmmm... there's a lot of money in the museum game... Well, no. It would be purely non-profit. Hmmm... there's a lot of money in the non-profit game... No. There's none. Hmmm... there's a lot in none... Task: Build the Springsonian Museum Hey pally, those are some nice specimens. I could "disappear" a few things from the ol' exhibits here. We could make some good "money". Isn't that stealing? It ain't "stealing" so long as you use air quotes. Oh, right. I "understand". Quest reward: 500 and 10

It's About Time Pt. 6

After completing It's About Time Pt. 5: Marge, I'm sorry I forgot our anniversary. But this time I've got a solid excuse, involving time travel. Do I know you, sir? I'm Artie Ziff! And I would like to know what you are saying to this woman, Mrs. Artie Ziff! Oh, no! I've messed up the spacetime continuum, and now Marge is married to Artie Ziff! "Spacetime continuum"? I think you mean the "when-where thingamabob", which is what we call it in THIS thingamabob, thank you very much. Task: Make Homer Check if He's Disappeared From Photos (4h, Simpson House) Dad? What are you doing home at this hour? Yeah, you don't get off work at the donut factory until seven. Okay, I may have lost Marge, but at least I still have my kids and what sounds like a way better job. But wait -- who's your mother? Hello, my tubby hubby! Augh! Vegas Marge! Quest reward: 100 Event Currency and 10

Land of the Lard

Land of the Lard Pt. 1

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: What could I possibly have done to make Marge fall for a billionaire like Artie, instead of a worthless drunk like me? I'm assuming that in your timeline, the Lisa that's your daughter warned you not to alter the past. That's why I love you, Lisa. In any universe, you're a shameless nag. Two things: first, Other Me told you so. Nah-nah-nah. And second, whatever tiny change you made to history, there has to be a way to undo it. Then I won't quit until I've set things aright. Or enough time has passed that I don't seem like too bad a guy for giving up! Task: Make Homer Unchange the Future (4h, Homer's Workbench) On job start: I've located the caveman most likely to be Artie's ancestor. But how to be sure...? I'm Caveman Ziff! Now all I gotta do is figure out how to stop him from ever having offspring, and modern-day Artie just disappears! This is the nicest form of murder I've ever come up with. What a good guy I am! On job end: Hey, Caveman Ziff! Where are all the other men? How come you stay at the cave all day, alone with the women? Well, those troglodytes consider me a shameful weakling, unfit to join the clan's hunting party. So I am left here... all day... alone with their wives... When you're the only available man, it hardly matters HOW pitiable you are. Your very pathetic-ness is your greatest strength. Fascinating! Thank you! Quest reward: 850 Event Currency and 10

Land of the Lard Pt. 2

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: I need to show the cave ladies Artie is too big a coward to mate with. No matter HOW desperate they are. Bart, I need firecrackers. I don't have any firecrackers. You're not in trouble, I will pay you. Please, tell me or else, and I love you. All good reasons. Second drawer. Task: Make Homer Set Off Firecrackers (4h, Homer's Workbench) On job start: Look! Look, Neander-babes! See how Caveman Ziff cowers from the fiery explosions! On job end: Behold, ladies! I have created fire! Tremble at my extreme desirability! D'oh! Quest reward: 850 Event Currency and 10

Land of the Lard Pt. 3

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: Lisa, if you needed to outsmart a primitive cave-person raised in an environment of complete ignorance, what would YOU do? You're smarter than a caveman. You've just got to be. I know! I'll crush him with a rock! I take that back. I suppose I could get him drunk. Expose him to our modern, high-tech alcohols. Let him make a fool of himself. How needlessly complex. Give it a shot! Task: Make Homer Leave a Keg for Caveman Artie (4h, Homer's Workbench) Hey, idiot! You're supposed to DRINK from the keg, not roll it around! Behold, women! Caveman Ziff has another amazing invention. First, fire. Now, the wheel! Swoon at my greatness! At this rate, I'll return to a world populated entirely by Artie Ziffs. Quest reward: 850 Event Currency and 10

Land of the Lard Pt. 4

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: You know what they say: if at first you don't succeed, and at second you suck even worse, go back to the first idea you had, but do it bigger. Hey, Professor! What's the biggest explosion you can whip up in ten minutes or less? What's the rush? You DO have access to a time machine. Glayvin. I don't see your point. Chop chop! All righty. I WAS going to provide you with a small nuclear device, but owing to your profound and obvious imbecility, just take this rocket. Now leave me alone. Have fun destroying something. Task: Make Homer Fire a Rocket (4h, Homer's Workbench) On job start: Behold, Cave honeys! Caveman Ziff, a very ugly and puny man, has meddled with the forces of nature, and now the gods are pissed! Let's see... how do you set this rocket off...? ... Uh, oh. On job end: So, good news: I don't think Caveman Ziff is too popular with the ladies anymore. Bad news: we now know what wiped out the wooly mammoths. And that all the saber-toothed tigers were crushed beneath falling wooly mammoths. System Message The story will continue in Act 2. Keep collecting Fossils and Hidden Gems to get more prizes! Quest reward: 2.050 Event Currency and 10

Act 2 Gameplay

Walk Like an Egyptian Pt. 1

Walk Like an Egyptian Pt. 1

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark: Is anyone else alarmed by the dog-faced men, wandering our town? I've never felt more at home. Silence! I, Pharaoh the living God, do hereby command the building of a Great Artiefice. Way to create jobs, Pharaoh! With my new job, I'll finally be able to afford health care. Well, these aren't exactly the kind of jobs that pay money. Hey, all any of us ask of a leader is to create jobs. You've done that, and I'm a man of my word. Next election, you've got my vote. You don't elect a Pharaoh! Task: Make Springfielders Do Manual Labor [x5] (4h, Homer's Workbench) I've never seen so many jobs created. I must be jobbing sixteen hours a day. Thanks, Pharaoh! We are truly fortunate to live in a country where our leader cares so much about the most important thing: jobs. Back to work! Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Walk Like an Egyptian Pt. 2

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: People! The Pharaoh has no right to force you to work without pay! Resist! Resist, I say! Whoa, are you trying to take away our jobs? The Pharaoh created them just for us! In the world I come from, we get PAID to work. Really? Wow, you must work super hard. How many limestone blocks do you shape and haul every day? Buddy, if I shaped and hauled any fewer limestone blocks at my job, it'd be criminal. Task: Make Homer Sow Insurrection (4h, Homer's Workbench) I don't know, Homer. Pharaoh is God, second only to Ra, the Sun God himself. Wait. Your religion has TWO gods? That makes it twice as powerful as mine! Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Walk Like an Egyptian Pt. 3

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: Good news, Flanders: I'm devoting my life to religion. All hail the mighty Ra, God of the Sun. What? But Ra isn't the one true God! He says He is. Okay, but He's wrong. My Guy says so in His holy book. We've got one of those, too. I guess it's a classic He said/He said deal. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to conduct the sacrament of staring at my God for hours. Task: Make Homer Stare at the Sun (4h, Homer's Workbench) Task: Make Ned Be Horrified (4h, Flander's House) Ra has rewarded my devotion with a vision. Where I was blind, now I see. Also, now I am blind. Don't stare at the sun, kids. Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Walk Like an Egyptian Pt. 4

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: The mighty Ra has spoken to me, and decreed that we must unionize! Okay, great! What is "unionize"? It's when workers band together to fight for their rights. What happens when Pharaoh says no to their demands? Then we do the most awesome thing ever: walk a picket line, chanting, holding signs, and looking mildly embarrassed about the whole thing. ... Or, we could skip right to the armed insurrection? Task: Make Homer Lead a Strike (4h, Homer's Workbench) Task: Make Springfielders Overthrow Pharaoh [x5] (4h, Homer's Workbench) We did it! Pharaoh is defeated! Never again will the top one percent trample on the rights of the poor! Er, yeah. About that... Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Walk Like an Egyptian Pt. 5

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: I went back in time and overthrew Pharaoh, and it hasn't changed anything about today. Oh mighty Ra, what's thy holy deal?! You can't expect anything useful to come from staring at the sun for a few hours. You're right. Deep down, I know it. Total enlightenment would take at least twice that long! Task: Make Homer Stare at the Sun (4h, Homer's Workbench) Homer, what have you done to yourself? Ra commands me to get Marge back. Ra is good. I'm sorry to tell you this, but you're blind. Permanently. Until the writers need you not to be blind for a joke, at which time you will heal miraculously. Congratulations! Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

The Time Traveler's Wife (continued)

The Time Traveler's Wife Pt. 1

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark: Dad! What happened to your face? Never mind that. I'm going back to warn Past Me not to mess with that stupid time machine. But Dad, don't you realize that very action is what sets this whole sequence of events in motion? That's because Past Me didn't want to listen to Future Me. But I'm not Future Me anymore. Now, Lisa, I'm Now Me. ... Task: Make Homer Warn Past Homer (4h, Homer's Workbench) Time travel is so great. Always makes A TON of sense. System Message The story will continue in Act 3. Keep collecting Papyri and Hidden Gems to get more prizes! Quest reward: 2.000 Event Currency and 10

Act 3 Gameplay

Love in a Time of Scurvy

Love in a Time of Scurvy Pt. 1

After tapping on Lisa's exclamation mark: Eek! The town is overrun with rats! Ugh. Can't believe I just said "eek". You call this overrun? This ain't overrun. I can still see the floor, most places. Hey, if I got rid of the rats, do you think THAT would make Marge love me again? Shrug. That's how uninvested in your question I am. I'm actually saying the word "shrug" out loud. I'll take that as a "yes"! Task: Make Homer Tempt Fate (4h, Homer's Workbench) On job start: Heeeeeelp! Raaaaaaats! Marge! It's pronounced Marrrrrge, ye beached whale. And that's me girl yer talkin' too. Alternate Timeline Pirate Artie Ziff! That's Arrrrrtie -- with five rrrrrs. I'll hear if you miss one. On job end: This is it! I can make Marge love me if I save her from a life of hatch-battening, parrot-swabbing, and buckle-swashing. Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Love in a Time of Scurvy Pt. 2

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: I'm assembling a pirate crew, and I need recruits! What are the terms of employment? I've been cheated by pirates before. Unbelievable, I know, but true. I'm looking for fifty good men. Every man gets 100% of all booty plundered. Make it 110%, and you've got yerself a crew. Task: Make Homer Assemble a Crew (4h, Homer's Workbench) Task: Make Springfielders Join Homer's Crew [x5] (4h, Homer's Workbench) Your men are ready to fight and die for you, Cap'n Homer. What are your orders? Shiver those timbers, men! Hoist up the keel! Avast those mateys! We're huntin' Ziffs! Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Love in a Time of Scurvy Pt. 3

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: If we're to stand a chance against Pirate Captain Ziff, my crew, we'll need to sharpen yer skills. You mean like sailing, sword fighting, and swashbuckling? I was thinking more of drinking rum, sea shanties, and drinking grog. Can we skip the shanties? Done and done. Begin training montage! Task: Make Homer Teach the Ways of the Pirate (4h, Homer's Workbench) Task: Make Springfielders Learn the Ways of the Pirate [x5] (4h, Homer's Workbench) I love you guys. I mean -- *hic!* -- fifty lashes to the first one of ye that forgets to tip his cap at me, but still... I love you guys. Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Love in a Time of Scurvy Pt. 4

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: Homer, we're running out of rum, we keep sailing in circles, and I got scurvy. Mind you, I had it already. Arrrrr. As a man of the sea, I may be able to help. Let's cheat. Cheat? But I'm a pirate! It is simply not done! What if we stop pretending we're in pirate times, and we use modern guns, radar, and computers to take down our foe? Wait, we have access to those? Know what? Fine. You do a time travel story, this is what you get. Task: Make Homer's Crew Fight With Future Technology [x5] (4h, Homer's Workbench) This isn't the last you've heard of me! I shall return in Pirates of Springfield 2: On Dumber Tides! Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

Homercoming

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: Marge? Marge, honey, I'm home! Well hidely-ho, fellow flatmate. Who's this Marge fella you're jabbering on about? Flanders?! We live together? Is Jesus okay with this? Who cares? You know I'm an atheist. Wow. I miss Marge, but I gotta admit -- it's pretty great hearing you say that. Task: Make Homer Live Happily Ever After With Ned (4h, Simpson House, Ned) I must go try to find my Margie, stupid atheist Flanders. But please know I will always detest you slightly less than regular you. Quest reward: 600 Event Currency and 10

The Time Traveler's Wife (continued)

The Time Traveler's Wife Pt. 3

After tapping on Homer's exclamation mark: Moe, gimme a beer, and keep 'em coming. I'll never get back to my Springfield. Or my Marge. Homer Simpson?! Since when do YOU drink? Of all the Springfields in all the multiverse, I gotta end up in the only one where I'm not cool. Task: Make Homer Say Goodbye (4h, Homer's Workbench) On job start: Marjorie, I don't know if we'll ever be together, but I want you to know you're the most wonderful thing that never happened to me. On job end: Out of the way, fatso. Let me guess, now WE'RE married? Homer, Patty and Selma are here for our anniversary. Marge! I did it? I found a world where we're together? Of course we're together! How could I forget the man who traveled back in time to say I love you? System Message Congratulations! You've saved Homer's marriage for what will undoubtedly be the last time... until the next time. Quest reward: 2.000 Event Currency and 10