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Jazzy and the Pussycats/Quotes

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Season 18 Episode Quotes
379 "The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer"
380
"Jazzy and the Pussycats"
"Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em" 381


[Bart practices his new drum set all over town and accidentally crashes into the band White Stripes.]
Jack White: Hey, kid, why don't you watch where you're drumming!
Bart: "Sorry, White Stripes. No hard feelings?
[Meg and Jack White look at each other.]
Meg White: Let's kick his ass!

Homer: Boy, get dressed! You're going to a jazz brunch as punishment for all the racket you're making.
Bart: "I thought you wanted me to drum?
Homer: Hmph. I'm sending you mixed messages. Now get the hell out of here!" [slams door then opens it again.] "I love you so much. Damn you!

Defonzo "Skinny" Palmer: We were about to play a quick set and we were wondering if you...
Lisa: Yes?
Defonzo "Skinny" Palmer: Lisa Simpson...
Lisa: Yes?
Defonzo "Skinny" Palmer: Would do us the honor...
Lisa: Yes!
Defonzo "Skinny" Palmer: Of sitting in... [Lisa gasps] that chair in the audience. We wanna jam with your brother.

Lisa: All I wanted was to save those animals while Bart became a drummer, but I never thought the two stories would intersect!

Bart: I need you to teach me all about the world of juzz.
Lisa: It's jazz! Jazz! You don't even know the name of the thing you're stealing from me!

Jazzy Goodtime's waiter: What it is, hip cats? Would you like me to scat-sing the menu?
Bart: Hell, no.
Jazzy Goodtimes waiter: Oh, god bless you, sir!

Bart: So how did Malt Liquor Mommy die?
Marge: Stop calling her that!

[Marge is stressed about the possible doom of Lisa's animals.]
Bart: Oh, this benfit concert is gonna be Scooby Dooby!
Marge: I'm very happy for you, Bart. [Sighs]
Bart: Why are you sad? Thinkin' about your marriage?

[The dog Lisa didn't pick at the Animal Shelter comes back to haunt her in her sleep.]
Dog Spirit: Lisa Simpson, you've doomed me.
Lisa: Me? How?
Dog Spirit: By choosing the cuter puppy. You picked looks over personality, youth over experience, no history of rabies over unknown rabies status. And now I'm going to die!
Lisa: I never wanted that to happen!
Dog Spirit: You suuuck, You suuuck!
[The Dog Spirit scratches on Lisa's door to get out and Lisa opens it.]
Dog Spirit: Ah, thanks, sweetie. You suuuck!

Dr. Brentano: First, let me assure you that Bart's antics are perfectly normal for a seven-year-old.
Marge: Actually, he's ten.
Dr. Brentano: Oh, dear. Dear, dear, dear, dear, dear.

[Lisa spots Bart and his Blues muscian friends hanging out in the attic.]
Lisa: Bart! What are you doing here?
Bart: Uh, [stammers] not smoking reefer.
Blues Musician: Uh, that's right. We—we all not smokin' reefer.

[Lisa picks out a dog at the Animal Shelter.]
Lisa: Okay, this little guy's comin' home with me. [Pets the dog.] Ooh! Who's going to get neutered tomorrow? You are! Oh, yes you are!

[Marge takes away Bart's laser pointer.]
Marge: Bart! Do you want to leave the funeral early? Do you?
Bart: Yes! Of course.

Bart: My arm! It hurts where the tiger's biting it!
Season 18 Quotes
The Mook, the Chef, the Wife and Her Homer Jazzy and the Pussycats Please Homer, Don't Hammer 'Em Treehouse of Horror XVII G.I. (Annoyed Grunt) Moe'N'a Lisa Ice Cream of Margie (with the Light Blue Hair) The Haw-Hawed Couple Kill Gil, Volumes I & II The Wife Aquatic Revenge Is a Dish Best Served Three Times Little Big Girl Springfield Up Yokel Chords Rome-Old and Juli-Eh Homerazzi Marge Gamer The Boys of Bummer Crook and Ladder Stop, or My Dog Will Shoot! 24 Minutes You Kent Always Say What You Want